Top-10 Quirkiest Robot Masters

It’s time for more Robot Master goodness. Today I’m listing what I think are the quirkiest Robot Masters from the Mega Man series. For this list I simply collected what I thought were the weirdest, funniest, oddest, most unique… well, in a word quirkiest Robot Masters from each game. Mega Man 6 is rather prominent in this list and once again Mega Man 8 is not present since I never played it. The Mega Man 1 roster is also unfortunately not present, but they will be on a later Top-10, I promise.

An honourable mention is also in order. Mega Man 2 is absent from this list although initially I was going to include Air Man on it. The reason for why he just barely missed the list was because of a last second addition, but the goofy fan-mouthed robot is definitely one of my favourites from Mega Man 2, so the very least he deserves is a shout-out.

Let’s get ooooooon with the list…

10. Spring Man

As established previously, Spring Man gathers a lot of hatred from Mega Man fans but I personally like him. I mean look at the guy, he’s goofy as all hell. And that’s what I like about him. Sure he might look like Slinky Dog’s bastard son, but at least he also looks like a robot (unlike fucking Pump Man).

Also, I quite like his level for the cheery music and toyish feel, though bouncing around on the springs was giving me some unfortunate flashbacks to the Casino Night levels in Sonic-games. Plus, I’d personally be frightened of a robot that can stretch its arms to come and get me, but the fact that the guy’s head is also on a spring makes him more cartoony than menacing.

On the last list, I did point out that as a general rule, you shouldn’t use children’s playthings (tops, balls) as inspiration for your bosses, but I think Spring Man is both silly and threatening enough to walk the line without crossing it. Plus, they do use springs for things other than just slinkies.

9. Blizzard Man

There were several masters from Mega Man 6 who I wanted to feature on the list and this is the first one. The thing to remember is that the Robot Masters in MM6 weren’t built by Dr. Wily but submitted into a robot-construction contest from around the world. And for some reason, I always imagine that Blizzard Man was constructed by the Swedish (because as a Finn, I know we’re not this funny).

It’s a robot with a pair of skis and a winter-cap. How cool (pun not intended) is that? Every time I see Blizzard Man I get a warm cosy feeling inside. I even get it just from the thought, that someone loved snow and skiing so much that they would put frickin’ skis and a snow-cap on a robot.

However, Blizzard man’s quirkiness doesn’t really extend beyond being a skiing robot, which is why I didn’t want to put him too high on the list, but I definitely wanted to showcase him just because of the utterly Nordic feel I get from looking at him (which makes it such a shame that Mega Man 6 was never released in Europe). Ja eikun mäkeen!

8. Charge Man

As should be evident from the last two lists, my opinion of vehicle-based Robot Masters teeters slightly here and there. Charge Man, however has always been one of my favourites in this regard. I consider him a sort of evil counterpart of Thomas the Tank-Engine.

In Mega Man 5’s reasonably colourful roster of Robot Master, Charge Man really does stand out. He’s shaped like a train, his stage is actually on a train and, as everyone who’s played Mega Man 4 knows, Mega Man rides trains all the time (though on the roof since he’s too fucking cheap to actually buy a ticket). In Charge Man’s case, I think his train-like appearance is justified.

His name is a verb meaning forceful forward-moving motion. What else could he possibly be shaped like, besides a train? However, he’s not nearly as quirky as some of the other masters coming up.

7. Centaur Man

Centaur Man is quite simply the most uniquely formed Robot Master ever. Half-Man, Half-Horse, All Robot, that’s the best combination for a boss based on Greek mythology I’ve ever seen or heard. I don’t know why, but I just have a soft-spot for video-game centaurs, like Motaro from Mortal Kombat.

However, as cool and quirky of a robot master as he is, not too many people seem to like Centaur Man. Okay, he has a water-level, even though he’s not a water-themed Robot which is kinda weird. And essentially he’s just Flash Man 3.0 which is kind of weird.

However, Centaur Man’s look is positively iconic. He’s another Robot Master who I instantly associate with Mega Man 6. And no matter what anyone says, he is definitely one of the most unique looking Robot Masters in the Mega Man rosters.

6. Splash Woman

Mega Man 9 had a couple of really good, quirky ones and Splash Woman is already a quirk in that she is, in fact, the first female Robot Mistress in history. That alone should have earned her a spot in my top-10, but at least I can give her recognition in this list. Why? Because she’s a frickin’ mermaid!

Mermaids are proof that you don’t need legs to be sexy. Splash Woman however, is what I like to call “classy hot”, but I think her aquatic feel also makes her stand-out amongst the many water-themed Robot Masters from the series. She also had a bitchin’ stage theme song and definitely one of my favourite water-levels from a Mega Man game (though nothing tops Bubble Man for me personally).

Splash Woman seemed like the perfect complementary addition on this half of the list to Centaur Man which is why I decided to include her at the last minute. She is definitely unique, but not quirky enough to make it onto the Top-5.

5. Bright Man

This guy was already in my Top-10, but I have to say that Bright Man just tops every single “I got something stuck on my head”-type Robot Master in my book. At the risk of repeating myself, he’s just a pudgy guy with a light-bulb stuck to his head, but I get a warm feeling from seeing him every time.

He’s just a really endearing character and one I identify instantly with Mega Man 4. Bright Man beat out Dust Man, Drill Man, Ring Man and even Skull Man to make it on this list (though Skull Man is perhaps more scary than quirky). Interestingly he’s also Flash Man 2.0, which means I have two incarnations of time-stopper master, but not the original himself. Maybe Flash Man will make my top-10 of most underappreciated Robot Masters…

In the meanwhile the pudgy bulb-head from Russia reigns supreme over the number-5 spot, because as funny as I find him, there are four Robots who I think are even weirder.

4. Tomahawk Man

Tomahawk and Flame Man are where the Mega Man 6 roster starts to turn borderline racist, but you know what, I really like Tomahawk Man for some reason. At least when Capcom decides to depict a stereotypical Native American, they give you the whole package: feather headgear, war-paint, a loincloth (for a robot, yeah) and what does Tomahawk Man use as his weapons? Fucking Tomahawks… Fucking A!

I seriously just love Tomahawk Man’s stage in Mega Man 6. Maybe, I just have a soft-spot for Westerns but I love the cowboy-bots blasting away with their six-shooter, the classic western sounding stage-theme and the blazing sun in the background. Tomahawk Man just gets every Western cliché right which is why it’s just a joy to go fighting with him.

I think Tomahawk Man is certainly bizarre enough of warrant a spot in the top-5, but I do think other Robot Masters can best him in the sheer quirkiness department.

3. Spark Man

Lo and behold, another familiar face from my Top-10. Spark Man really is just one of my all-time favourite Robot Masters and he’s quirky as hell too. As mentioned before, he’s one of the few Robot Masters who really does look Robotic. He doesn’t have a traditionally shaped torso and his gigantic electrode arms just put his entire body out of proportion.

You can just tell that Spark Man was originally designed to be a part of a power-company’s electrical equipment. He certainly looks the part more than Elec Man from Mega Man 1. I think Spark Man just set the standard too high for future electricity themed Robot Masters that they simply don’t compare. When I think of an electrical Robot Master, I think of him.

Plug Man from Mega Man 9 would have come pretty close, but I still can’t take his name seriously and it leads to a lot of disgusting images in my head.

2. Toad Man

One of the all-time goofiest looking Robot Masters ever, Toad Man may not look threatening but he’ll certainly attract your attention the minute you see him. I mean, what can I say? The guy looks like he was devoured by a giant frog. He’s another iconic face from Mega Man 4 and as much as I love Bright Man, Toad Man does take the cake for being the weirdest looking Robot Master from that game.

Toad Man’s level is also quite unique with running water-falls (in sewers, so you know its poo-water that Mega Man is running through) and through the storm which makes jumping difficult. Also, Toad Man’s attack is probably the strangest ever. He does a little dance and causes rain to fall down which hurts Mega Man. Shouldn’t that be Tomahawk Man’s attack (no wait, that actually would be racist)?

In summation, Toad Man is just frickin’ weird and I love him. He’s pretty dang hard to beat in the quirkiness department, so who could possibly do it.

1. Galaxy Man

This little tyke from Mega Man 9 is one of the most delightfully weird things to have come out of the newer titles of the series. Sure, he’s just a flying-saucer with legs, but the thing I love best about him is that he actually looks like a robot.

He’s got strange little antennae, arms and legs, but no face. He only has two little eyes with no pupils and not even a suggestion of a human face. Yet, he still waves his hands around and acts goofy which just makes him really adorable. And as mentioned in the Top-10, he had my favourite level in Mega Man 9.

Galaxy Man is the unquestionable winner because no other Robot Master really quite looks like him… well, maybe Astro Man from Mega Man 8, but I still think Galaxy Man is cuter and more quirky looking (Astro Man looks like a rip-off of the robot from Lost in Space).

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